I hear from a lot of people who feel tired, stifled, belittled, overwhelmed, and patronized at work. They feel disrespected in meetings, put down by their "teammates," or are just exhausted to their core. So many of us put up with jobs and organizations that diminish who we fundamentally are. We feel bad, heavy, or mixed up at work but tell ourselves that it's just because we're not tough enough to "hang." We become convinced that since we feel badly, something must be wrong with us.Read More
We need a new vision for work - a vision that's more alive and more vibrant than the mechanical environments that most of us are offered in our jobs today.
Many of us still believe in old stories about work, stories that tell us things like: "you need a boss," "what matters is the bottom line," or "once you get to the top, you'll be happy."
Even if we know those things aren't true, we still cling to them and strive to fit into stories that don't serve us. We're hungry for something else, but we aren't quite sure what that is.Read More
I grew up as the oldest of five kids. Our family of seven was...bustling, to say the least.
As the oldest, I thought it was my job to minimize the stress on my parents as much as possible, and so I got very good at being obedient (until my teenage years, anyway - but that's a post for another day).
I was a pretty mellow kid and didn't get bored easily, and my siblings were fairly similar. One thing we heard over and over again at church was "you kids are so well-behaved!"Read More
I use the word "wild" a lot in my worklife. I use the word in many of my offerings to folks, and it's one way that I want to feel on a daily basis, no matter what I'm doing. The word "wild" can conjure up all sorts of images, from unruly teenagers to rock stars, which isn't exactly the point I'm trying to make by using it. To me, "wild" resonates because it's about something much deeper within us.
Something we may have forgotten about consciously but that never went away.
To be wild is to live in harmony with our true nature.
It's about instinct, and intuition, and a sense of connectedness that most of us don't experience on a regular basis.
I often wonder if there's room for our wild selves at work. In most organizations - and this is even true for entrepreneurs like me - there are layers and layers of unspoken rules about what's acceptable and what's not.
From where I sit, I see a bourgeoning desire among professionals to reconnect with the natural world, which of course includes their own internal wildernesses. This is a beautiful thing. It means that more freedom, authenticity, and truth are at hand.
So, what does it mean to be wild at work?
If being wild is about being our true selves, then I see it showing up in four major ways:
First, as a deeper connectedness to our bodies.
Up until two or three years ago, I couldn't have told you what my body might think about the stress I was in at work. I assumed bodies were for using - my body got me to work, it typed things, and it was a real annoyance every time it needed to eat or sleep. I was separated from my body, which is a real shame given the fact that it was sending me blaring alarm signals that I could have listened to.
Other animals can't separate from their bodies like we do. Our minds give us the ability, for better or worse, to override what our bodies are telling us about a situation.
To be wild at work means that we partner with our bodies instead of hating them for placing limitations on us. We express gratitude for the fact that we're here on this earth in this way and honor that by taking good care of the skin we're in. To be wild at work might mean sleeping more, taking regular breaks every 90 minutes at work, or choosing foods that support the body.
Second, to be wild at work is to be connected to the Earth.
Can you imagine putting a bunch of bears in a climate-controlled office environment with fluorescent lighting on them all day? Let's say they're there for months, and even years, day in and day out. How would that change them?
I don't think anyone would argue that bears should be in that kind of environment all day for years at a time, but a lot of us assume that it's fine for humans.
The truth is, being in an environment where we're shut off from Nature is detrimental to us, too.
To be wild at work is to cultivate a connection to the Earth in some way, even if you do have to sit in a poorly lit cubicle 40+ hours/week. Maybe your instinctual nature will be nourished enough by going on hikes over the weekends, or tending to a plant on your desk, or looking at cute animal pictures on your lunch break.
Third, it's about reconnecting to our intuition.
When I think about having to survive in the wild on my own, I just shrug my shoulders and assume I'd be dead in a matter of days. Martha Beck talks a lot in her book Finding Your Way in a Wild New World about the amazing abilities of modern-day trackers. These are people who track wild animals using skills that most of us in the "real world" have totally lost touch with.
There is so much mystery and truth right underneath our rationale-loving noses, and if we can reconnect with our intuition, it will guide us. We can learn to track our own desires again.
To be wild at work is to know and trust your own internal GPS even though there's external pressure to be logical and justify your actions. You'll know when it's your intuition because it will feel clear and free, as if you just know where to find the water and food you need.
Finally, to be wild at work is to be connected to one another.
Before we could all go to the grocery store, rent apartments of our own, and be entertained by little screens, we existed in tribes of around 100 people. We were embedded. The concept of "loneliness" may not have even existed.
Some wild animals are solitary beings, but not us. To be disconnected - at work or in any area of our lives - is physically painful to us. More and more research is demonstrating the harmful health outcomes that come along with living in isolation, and work is one of the most common places where people feel alone.
If we really let our natural, true selves out of the "civilized" prison we've constructed around us, we can connect more deeply with one another. At work, this requires us to be authentic and loving - to assume the best in our colleagues even when we feel like they're getting in our way somehow.
You know what's the most beautiful part about this concept of being "wild"?
It's that we're already there.
We are in bodies, on the earth, with intuition and the ability to connect with each other.
We are wild, despite our civilization and occasional disconnection from ourselves.
All we have to do is reclaim what feels natural to us.
If this topic feels wild or natural or energizing to you, then you might be interested in a free webinar I'm doing next Wednesday, 1/11/17, at 10am PST.
It's called How to Work in a Wild New Way, and we'll be digging deeper into this topic.
I'm offering working women in Portland a new, innovative group experience starting October 29th, and it's called A Wild New Work. This group is for women who are ready to make work work for them.
It's for women who want to find ways to bring more of themselves into their careers with a supportive community behind them.
We'll meet for four hours per session and dig deep into issues like intuition, boundaries at work, and work life integration.
If you're ready to shake things up in your worklife and imagine a better, wilder way of doing things, I've got some good news:
I'm giving away a spot in this group for free!
Spaces normally cost $475, but with one click, you could be joining us gratis!
Here's all you have to do: just pick a social media outlet (or choose all three and triple your chances to win!) below and "like" the post! That will enter your name into the raffle, and I'll choose the winner on Wednesday afternoon. Easy peasy!
I realized something the other day as my husband and I were driving out to the Mt. Hood National Forest: deciduous trees get all the glory this time of year.
Their bright, flashy leaves draw us in and announce to us that Autumn has arrived. Feeling their crunch under our feet or throwing them up in the air over us is a joyful experience, and the leaves are kind of the signature of the season.
But what about the quieter changes taking place?
What about all the other trees, the ones that don’t seem to change much throughout the year?
I always thought that evergreen trees like pine or cedar grew up, dropped some cones and maybe a few needles along the way, and were mostly unchanging throughout time. During our weekend trip in this spectacular forest, I wondered if that was actually true. Nothing is unchanging, right? So what happens inside of these seemingly ever-stable trees during the Fall?
It turns out that evergreen trees go through changes of their own each year, but it’s much more subtle and less “out there” than their fiery deciduous cousins.
Evergreen trees shed old needles every few years, and before those needles drop, they turn yellowish brown. This process is totally natural, but a lot of people mistakenly believe that this change means the tree is sick or dying. Some trees only shed needles on the inside of the branches, making their transformation almost invisible unless you look closely.
In my work with people who want to make a shift in their career, there’s a lot of pressure to make big, sweeping changes - changes that are apparent and obvious to others looking in on their lives. And some people do make those changes, very quickly - one day their leaves are all fiery oranges and reds, and I know they’re ready to make the leap.
Others, however, are like the evergreens. They’re much slower to make changes, and sometimes the change taking place is so deep inside of them that it’s difficult to see. For months and months, it can seem like nothing is really shifting, and then one day, they have a branch full of old brown needles that are ready to drop.
We are each our own kind of tree in this transformational season, and we may even be different kinds of trees throughout our lives.
The past few years of my life have been like that of a sugar maple tree, ablaze in the Autumn and undergoing major changes every year. Other times, however, I’ve felt much more evergreen - as if nothing on the surface was changing until one day, it did.
Trust the natural changes that want to take place in your life, even if you feel like the leaves aren’t dropping quickly enough.
The leaves on any tree change color and drop from the branches without thinking or being made to - they simply respond to the changing environment around them and go when it’s time.
Your leaves are your thought and behavior patterns, the parts of your past that need to be integrated, and aspects of life like your career, relationships, etc. You’ll know when they’re ready to change color and drop off your branches because your intuition will tell you they are.
You’ll have a sense that something needs to change, that you want more from a part of your life, or you’ll hit rock bottom and be forced to look at a tree full of empty branches and ready for new growth.
This process is much simpler and more graceful when we’ve developed a relationship to our intuition and can sense the shift before we’re faced with a crisis and forced to change.
Have you heard about the concept in Chinese medicine and other ancient belief systems that says that sickness begins in the spirit, or the aura, or whatever word fits for you? The idea is that disease is a manifestation of an illness that began long before we could see it in the physical body. If we can develop a strong relationship with what’s happening in our energy systems, we can sense a disturbance and address it before it makes us really sick.
The same is true for our intuition and the changes our souls want us to make. Sometimes life pushes us to the edge with a crisis that forces us to look at some things we wouldn’t see before. Other times, we’re given the opportunity to sense something that’s not yet “real” and make the change without needing to go through crisis.
Try not to hang on to the leaves that want to turn brown and drop to the ground.
Try to trust that your intuition, or your heart, is at work and able to show you what needs to change and when - even if you feel like a Bosnian pine tree that hasn’t dropped needles in five years.
Intuition is one of the most amazing and accessible tools that I focus on in my work with people, and I’ve seen its ability to transform lives and careers.
Everyone has intuition, and some of us need help tapping back into its wisdom from time to time. Intuition will be the focus of an entire day in my upcoming group coaching series for women, A Wild New Work. We’ll spend time exploring how intuition manifests for each of us and look at what it might have to say about our worklives and what we’re here on this earth to do.
If you’re a working woman in Portland who has a sense that some needles or leaves need to drop in order for new growth to come in, I hope you’ll consider joining us starting October 29th. You can learn more at this link.
No matter where you are in the world, I hope you’ll make some extra space for your intuition today, whether it’s by journaling, sitting quietly outside, or just holding your heart and taking a deep breath.
Let the seasonal changes of your soul carry you - they will if you let them.
A lot of what I've been doing lately has been centered around this concept of "a wild new work." I think that term is appealing to folks because it sounds alive. And hopeful. Many people are hungry for work to be different - for it to be nourishing and adventurous instead of a source of depletion or fear. For others, it's easy to throw off this concept as frivolous, or optional - as if only privileged freelancers or white collar workers have the right to dream of something better.
From where I sit, this concept is not optional.
To work in a way that is life-giving is part of the next phase of our human evolution, if we choose to be brave and allow it to unfold. If you believe that the way we treat people in most organizations has no impact on how we treat the earth or the beings we share it with, then I'm sorry, but you are mistaken.
What does it do to a person to go to a stale office building every day to do meaningless work under the hum of fluorescent lights? How does monotony and micro-management change us over time?
According to psychologist Barry Schwartz, we are deeply shaped by the work that we do and the environments in which we do that work. (Check out his 10-minute TED Talk for more on this).
What does that mean for you? When you look around you at your work, does it strike you as an environment that you want to become?
For some of you, I think the immediate reaction would be "No!"
Some of the most troubling aspects of the way many of us work now are:
- The systemic squashing of our own internal truth and integrity (e.g., our obsession with "experts," "objectivity," and productivity above all else)
- The rampant disconnection: from the earth, from animals, from those we love, and, therefore, from our own humanity
When we work in places where those things are true, we experience sickness, whether it's physical, mental, or spiritual.
In these environments, we forget who we are, which makes it easy for us to become desensitized to things like the systematic harm done to people of color or the literal pillaging of the earth (#nodapl). We fill our bank accounts or get to tell others about our fancy job, but meanwhile, something is closing off inside of us. As Viktor Frankl wrote, "Ever more people today have the means to live, but no meaning to live for."
Because of what it does to us and our communities over time, the tightness and misalignment that's felt in so many workplaces by so many people is a serious issue. The tightness and misalignment you feel is a serious issue.
Things have to change.
The work we dedicate so much of our lives to should make us - and the world around us - healthier. And there are people who are making that a reality today. Tami Simon, founder of a company called Sounds True, shares her vision of how business can be different:
We have this idea about business--everything we do has to help us make more money, be more productive or whatever. But that's not my view of business. My view of business is that we are coming together as a community to fill a human need and actualize our lives.
I believe her vision is possible and have seen it happen for myself and others - including people working within organizations. There are always things you can do to nurture your spirit and your humanity, even in the midst of a mechanical workplace. If you feel interested in learning new ways to work and support yourself, I've got three ideas:
You can join our Facebook group, A Wild New Work, where we share resources and discuss issues coming up for working people.
If you're a working woman in Portland, you could check out the four-week group I'm offering starting October 29th, where we will get very real about all of this and shake things up in our worklives.
If any of those ideas resonate with you, I hope you'll take a step forward.
Your relationship to work, how you're treated in your worklife, and how you treat yourself in your worklife are so important, and I hope that, no matter what, you at least give yourself permission to want what's best for you and your gifts.
I was really afraid to publish a post called 50 Reasons You Feel Like Shit at Work, and I was fearful in large part because it was so critical of common organizational practices. For a long time, I was worried about coming across as too negative, too anti-organization, and so I wrote more mild posts in an effort to support readers while also keeping a door open to do work within organizations. I thought that if I played nice enough, I could continue writing while also working to make change inside of companies, even though when I'd tried, it felt totally draining.
We need innovative, forward-thinking people inside of organizations to drive change. Absolutely. For sure. And we also need people on the fringes noticing and giving voice to the things that are harmful and need to stop, which is where I feel more aligned with who I really am.
We need both kinds of people if we're going to create organizations that allow people to show up as wholly themselves.
There is an unhealthy amount of silence around our organizations and their practices today. I felt afraid to post what I did because it still feels taboo to me to be critical of companies or non-profit groups. And yet, they wield a lot of power, and because of that, need to be held to a higher level of accountability.
Why are so many of us uncomfortable talking about the lack of transparency and humanity in these places?
I think it's because for many of us, doing so has been labeled "unprofessional," and we're afraid of what could happen if we're critical of the very people who sign our paychecks.
Many of our ancestors have either been part of a labor movement or were working adults while their peers were trying to form unions. I know how controversial unions can be, and some of them are just as crooked as the organizations they're "protecting" employees from, but their foundational purpose is pure: to publicly hold organizations accountable for how they treat their employees.
We need people to serve that function. We need to unveil harmful practices like hiding pay practices from employees, expecting salaried employees to work way more than 40 hours/week, and putting employees through patronizing disciplinary processes.
We need less silence and more accountability. Without bringing things out into the open, they stay secret and gnarly and more harmful than if we just looked at them and at least acknowledged that they were happening.
It breaks my heart when I hear about people who feel like they have no one they can talk to about an abusive boss, a total sense of overwork, or a suspicion that they're being paid less than their peers for the same work. These are real, serious issues, and while I know the people in power often feel just as isolated and afraid as those "below" them, they're kind of like politicians: they should be beholden to the people in their community.
Some organizational leaders will, for a long time to come, cling to the notion that they're actually only beholden to "the business," as if that's a real thing.
The social contract between workers and organizations is changing though, and the organizations that succeed will be the ones who stop trying to hide harmful practices and who humbly partner with their people to make things better.
Whether you work in an organization or without, I encourage you not to be silenced anymore. If you see something destructive, shed light on it. If you see something beautiful that needs more room to grow, do whatever you can to give it that.
You get to decide what kind of a place you want to work in, and you can effect real change by doing your part to hold the organization and its leaders accountable for their decisions and their treatment of you, the community, and the earth itself.
I know it's not always comfortable, but it is a requirement for those of us calling for a new, healthier, more authentic world of work.
If you'd like to join a community that's discussing some of these issues, I invite you to check out our Facebook group, A Wild New Work.
This is part nine in a new nine-part discussion series called "A Wild New Work," which is focused on helping people introspect about their own worklives and how to imbue them with more wildness, freedom, and joy. Today's question is:
What's the next juiciest step?
You don't have to figure out your entire career trajectory today (or ever). What's the next thing you want to do in your worklife that feels awesome? Is it a project? Setting up a coffee date with someone you admire? What feels intriguing and a little exciting?
p.s.: Today is a new moon! This is a great time to set some small (or big) intentions for the next four weeks until another new moon.
This is part eight in a new nine-part discussion series called "A Wild New Work," which is focused on helping people introspect about their own worklives and how to imbue them with more wildness, freedom, and joy. Today's question asks you to be fearless:
What are you afraid of?
What makes your stomach knot up? What about your worklife feels scary today? Look it in the eye and be honest with yourself here.